Megabyte Man Vs. the Trojan Horse
By: Patrick Rue
Megabyte Man got an eMail message one day from a concerned eCitizen.
The eCitizen opened an application and then a message appeared on the screen
saying that the program has just corrupted all the data on the hard disk.
Luckily, the eCitizen had backups of everything so he was safe instead of
Megabyte Man wanted to get to the root of the problem, so responded and
asked where he got the program. The eCitizen got it online from someone
who eMailed it to him. It was supposed to be a SimCity update but instead
it was a Trojan Horse.
Megabyte Man found the creator of the application, finally, after doing a
lot of research. Megabyte Man decided to give this person a little visit
so he converted himself into binary and entered his Macintosh. He attached
himself to an eMail message and sent himself to the person who created the
Finally, 4 weeks later the Trojan Horse creator, Trojan Horse, checked his
eMail box and downloaded Megabyte Man without knowing it. Megabyte Man
himself as a word processor. When Trojan Horse opened Megabyte Man, the
word processor, he started writing source code for his next evil virus.
Megabyte Man converted himself from Binary to himself. Trojan Horse said
to Megabyte Man, "So, you found my hiding place, did you Megabyte
Megabyte Man dusted off his fingernails on his sleeve and said, "Yes,
do you have any last words before I call the Cyber Police?" Trojan
Horse replied, "Yes, but why don't you take a seat first?" Megabyte
Man sat down on Trojan Horse's couch and then SCSI cables tied up Megabyte
Man's body so he could hardly move. Trojan Horse grinned evilly and said,
"OK, so maybe I won't have any last words. Do you have any, Megabyte
Megabyte Man sat there on a couch thinking of how to get out of all the
trouble he was in.
Trojan Horse asked him, "So, do you have any family or friends?"
Megabyte Man responded, "Why would you want to know? Are you going
to tie them up too?" Trojan Horse said softly, "I'm not that bad
of a guy. I did this in self defense. I just want to know, I am making
"Okay, fine then Trojan Horse. My family are dead from a hacker just
like you who got a bit carried away and I have a few friends. I have Megabyte
Woman, my girlfriend, and Pat and Jeremy." said Megabyte Man. Trojan
Horse laughed out, "what a depressing personal life you lead!"
Trojan Horse left the room laughing.
Megabyte Man continued thinking of a way to get out of the mess he is in.
He needed to somehow contact a Cyber Cop or Megabyte Woman. He thought of
using his remote alarm pager to page Megabyte Woman but he had a hard time
Megabyte Man asked Trojan Horse to come in the room. Trojan Horse said,
"What do you want? I am very busy!" Megabyte Man said, "Well,
the problem is this SCSI cable is hurting my leg. Can you do something about
it?" Trojan Horse replied, "Okay, does this help?" Trojan
Horse kicks Megabyte Man's leg. Megabyte Man screamed, "Yes, thank
Megabyte Man knew that Trojan Horse wasn't going to make him feel better,
so would make him feel pain. But, what Trojan Horse didn't know is he kicked
the remote alarm pager.
Megabyte Woman was doing her exercises when her pager went off. She said,
"Hmm, this is weird, I've never had any distress signals put out by
Megabyte Man. I guess I better find out what's wrong.
Megabyte Woman hopped into her PowerPC powered car and went off to San Jose,
CA, where Trojan Horse lives. When she got to his house she dressed up as
a Little Ceaser's delivery woman and knocked on the door three times with
a pizza in one hand.
When Trojan Horse opened the door, Megabyte Woman said, "Pizza!
Trojan Horse said, "Oh boy, you guys are good! I was just thinking
of a pizza and here it is! Any Jolt to go with that?" Megabyte Woman
said,"Aw, sorry, I forgot the Jolt. Do you do the Dew?" Trojan
Horse said,"huh?" Megabyte Woman replied,"Mountain Dew, you
know?" Trojan Horse said," Oh, of course. Let me get some money
for you. I'll be right back!"
Megabyte Woman walked in the house and saw Megabyte Man tied to the couch.
Megabyte Woman said," Aw, MBM! Are you ok?" Megabyte Man
I'm ok. Let's get out of here before Trojan House comes back." Megabyte
Woman went over to the couch and started pulling on the SCSI cables. She
pulled them as hard as she could but she didn't have any luck. Then she
looked at the sides and back of the couch for a release switch. She couldn't
find it. Then she kicked the couch with anger and the SCSI cables unraveled
and went back inside of the couch. Megabyte Man said,"Good job
Megabyte Man and Megabyte Woman hugged each other and ran out of the house
of Trojan Horse. They got into the PowerPC car and skidded out off of Trojan
Horses' driveway. Trojan Horse ran outside and said,"I can catch up
to your car!" Megabyte Woman said" I don't think so! I just
to a 604! Megabyte Man and Megabyte Woman speeded into the sunset while
Trojan Horse was miles behind trying to catch up in his Pentium Powered